Tragically, most people grieve alone, which isn't the correct way to grieve and does not lessen the emotional trauma or the physical symptoms that grief causes.
Grief, like all traumas and unresolved issues, can go unrecognized and unhealed for many years, even so much as to be passed onto the next generation, unconsciously and unwittingly. Many people of our generation carry transferred grief from previous the generations of our parents and ancestors, without realizing that is it at the core of our anxieties, life patterns, illnesses and other self disassociation ailments.
Grief has many textures and elements. See if you recognize any of the following within yourself and your loved ones.
Stone cold grief is when the person disassociates from the emotions and feelings of grief altogether. There's a hardening within the person as if to protect them from the unbearability of the situation. They often suffer from physical ailments resulting from this emotional hardening, and will take drugs to numb them even more. Their words can be cold and hard, and it's common for this grief to be expressed as a lack of empathy and compassion. Trying to get emotional connection or intimacy from a person with this grief element is like trying to get blood from a stone.
Sword grief is pain that feels cold, sharp and metallic, as if being stabbed by a blade. It is cutting and the wounds of this grief render people sharp tongued, bitter, constantly in victim mode, complaining of injustices in the world and upon themselves. Their physical ailments will be from knife, sharp object and puncture wounds, or have wounds that are slow to heal, and they will have multiple surgeries and surgical mishaps. These people don't like to get close and will be stabbing with their words to protect themselves from showing vulnerability.
Deep well grief is the water element, a person who is stuck on drowning in their sorrows. They feel helpless to get out of this state and get caught in the incessant turmoil of their emotions, never seeming to reach the bottom of their tears. They are weepy types, and often resort to pulling others into the well with them to keep them company. They fear being alone forever. Physical ailments will be weepy sores, runny eyes, noses and discharges. They are likely to have bladder illnesses and leaky gut syndrome, and other such watery, pussy conditions.
Fire grief is the raging, out of control, angry grief, that lashes out and scorches others with temper and blame. They are quick to ignite and hot to handle, often being unable to control their emotional outbursts that appear far larger than the causation situation warrants. It can also show up as simmering embers, becoming inflamed at the slightest hint of lack of control. Their ailments will be from inflammation, red, angry looking sores, burning pains, heart attacks and acid re-flux.
Feather grief is where the person seems to float above themselves, the reality of the world, and of course their emotions. They are lofty in their ideals, attempting to be holier than thou and escape the harshness of real life. They have trouble associating with being human and living in the solid world, desiring to fly away to a better place. Their physical ailments will be wind related and their autoimmune systems will be weak. They cannot tolerate aggression or uncomfortable emotions and will always look for the next 'high'.
Empty well grief is the hollow, empty kind of grief, where a person is empty and bereft of feeling and often the will to live. Nothing satisfies them or fulfills them. Either food is a bare necessity and eating is a chore, or they cannot eat enough to fill the hole. These types will often have nothing to say, be numb to emotions and have little interest in anything. They will usually suffer from not enough money, or too much money, and try to fill their lives with material objects, or live with little to no possessions.
The only way to really grieve is to recognize which types of grief you carry and to powerfully and deeply acknowledge and release the beliefs and feelings that imprison you. Grieving must be done openly and with others, like in a trusted circle of elders, with your family or community, and ideally held in some sort of contained space or ceremonial situation.
Grief must be outed, expressed, held safe, and honoured with reverence. It is a sacred act to grieve, and heals not just the person grieving, but it ripples through time releasing the grief of the ancestors and liberating future generations from carrying the burden.
It's time to grieve.
When you grieve you feel relief.
The weight is lifted.
The dark skies above you clear.
The sun comes out again
and your true path becomes illuminated.
Properly releasing grief is the way to healing both the individuals and the collective, simultaneously. Reach out and find your tribe to grieve with.
JOIN SELF LOVE CLUB FREE and find the guided healing meditation for Grief
* Hello Beautiful Soul! *